The holidays are stressful. Women make that statement far more than men! The American Psychiatric Association (APA) summarized from a study produced in 2006, “Women are more likely than men to report an increase in stress during the holidays.” The main findings state, “Many people reported looking forward to the holidays as a time of good cheer. Irony at its best!
Many conditions originate with stress, especially if the stress is severe and persistent. A National Institute of Health (NIH) study published in 2017 names several body systems that stress adversely impacts. Chronic stress can actually decrease the brain’s weight by atrophy of brain mass! An increase in prolonged stress produces an increase in blood cortisol (stress hormone) that leads to reduction in memory. Stress, whether acute or chronic, has a detrimental effect on the cardiovascular system. Similar degree of impact on digestive system is also detrimental. More detail on stress and harmful impact to body in November News Letter. Question: Where is the good cheer?
How about our fellow female friends? There is a positive energy I recently acknowledged from my selected trusted female friends. I call this positive energy Estrogen Energy! Energy is the affirmative vitality I feel when allowed to immerse myself in the positive energy found in my female centric relationships! I’ve always been a part of group of women (3 or more) I hung out with throughout my life, all over most of the world. I did not spend every day with all of them, nor did I see all of them at once. These were always platonic friends although I do recall trying to date one or two. No, it didn’t work out but we remained friends while I stayed in that part of the world. Trust and communication. No matter how hard honesty and communication seem, my real friends can handle my truth! I still talk on line or exchange emails with a few international friends but when I speak of energy this is an exchange, I feel strongest with women I interact with in real life (IRL). A friend I met years ago in a chemistry lab formed a friendship with me, resulting in all of us; my partner and her partner doing things together and meshing our families together around birthdays, holidays and momentous occasions. The 4 of us enjoyed exploring the California coast, driving up to Bodega Bay for a few days and spending a weekend in San Francisco to Monetary Bay! We get together for dinners, BBQ and quarterly BUNCO games! In a different part of my life, I enjoy the periodic gathering of 3 adult women! Recently we attended a Queen revival at Music Box! What a night! About a year or so ago I joined the 3 women in a cabin at Big Bear! It was a weekend of enjoying morning coffee on a patio, hiking the gorgeous mountain scenery and oh the shopping! Then there a few women are breaking the IRL mold. One in particular, MINX is a fellow fitness enthusiast living on the other side of USA. She is becoming a welcomed source of positive energy. My east coast e friend is very active in yoga and pole exercise. She has unbelievable flexibility and is gracious enough to consider putting her energy and positive vigor on video to share her extensive knowledge of yoga and wellness. Recently, I slipped into a dark gray day, I battle depression daily. I recalled a discussion MINX either initiated or participated in. She referred to meditation and I felt here energy through the conviction of her words. I’ve incorporated meditation in my morning workout routine! Between physiological sweat and focus of meditation I’ve been able to keep depression and anxiety at bay! MINX is a very kind giving woman who exudes confidence, a common characteristic in all the women in my world who share their nurturing, positive energy. When I am in the presence of any one of these small groups of women, I totally forget daily stress and holiday stress vaporizes even as I recall the memories!
To the woman who is confident and strong enough to embrace vulnerability, we feel positive energy from friends and friendly people. We can accept the upbeat energy because our friends offer us a safe space. Unconditional friendship, belief and backing! An e friend on social media app talked about her recent massage. When the treatment was finished the married therapist kissed my e friend on the cheek. My friend noted that was unusual. I 1st commented on how Southern Belles treat friends with compassion and familiarity by default. My e friend replied that she was telling her travel stories to her female masseuse. I’m thinking the joy and enthusiasm my e friend displayed while re-living that travel experiences translated to the holistic therapist as energetic positive force and allowed her to be more vulnerable by kissing my e friend on the cheek!
I believe only women can share this powerful platonic intimate energy. Some men support women but they do not understand the bonds, the intimacy the belief! For example: I’ve gone to Palm Springs with a specific friend at the invitation of a couple to spend time at their Airbnb home. It is a great weekend with good friends. In Palm Springs there is a specific bar that holds bingo on Saturday nights. From the 1st time we attended 3 years ago I got intoxicated! I can get sloppy “What the hell did I do?” drunk, pass out next to my female friend and still wake up with all my clothes on my body! I do not drink shots with anyone else! This same friend picked me up after an outpatient procedure, took me to her home, put me to bed and ensure there was something to eat whenever I woke up! In a few months she gets a different outpatient procedure. When she had made consult appointment, she asked me to accompany her to the actual procedure! I did not hesitate! She knows I am busy with my job and this website so logically she asked, “Do you have time?” I answered, “I’ll make time.” I will make time…for her!
My east coast e friend wants to visit just to get out of the cold. I told her I have spare bedroom and joked that I could share my bed for a friend! She replied that her petite body would fit perfectly for cuddling in one bed!
Another female friend can be serious as we sit observing the sunset on Ocean Beach pier and for a while vet her fears to me. A few minutes later she pulls out a special tool box and we are laughing at how my body reacts to stimulation…again, platonic!
The interaction is always empowering, positive and shared among my female friends!
As I write this recalling the events, friends, I feel the empowering aura from all these women! As that positive energy cascades over my body I can put together the upcoming holiday dinner including a dish or 2 for carnivores in the group! I am a plant-based eater as of recent months. That is another blog.
Stay tuned for more information on stress, how detrimental it is to our bodies and a few strategies to mitigate the impact in my 1st newsletter!
